One of the longest novels ever written in the history of humanity is… a Super Mario fanfic

Is it a work by Homer? Perhaps Plutarch? Nothing could be further from the truth: it’s the fanfic by Aura Channeler Chris, the author of ‘The Subspace Emissary’s Worlds Conquest’. Quite something, isn’t it?

“It had been a long battle for survival, but he had managed to prevent the idiots from defeating him once and for all.” That’s how one of the longest novels in human history begins. Is it a work by Homer? Plutarch, perhaps? Nothing could be further from the truth: it is the fanfic by Aura Channeler Chris, the author of ‘The Subspace Emissary’s Worlds Conquest’. Quite something.

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Mario? … Mario!

Between 1913 and 1927, after 18 years of work, Marcel Proust completed his ‘In Search of Lost Time’, an epic of one and a half million words divided into seven parts that is not only an undeniable masterpiece, but also the longest work published on paper in history (hence the famous author’s madeleine, by the way). But it pales, and in a big way, compared to Chris’ colossal work based on ‘Super Smash Bros Brawl’.

221 chapters with a total of 4,102,328 words that were published from 2008 to 2018, when the author left the story unfinished with aliens entering Palutena’s world, from ‘Kid Icarus’. And before you ask: yes, there are people who have read it all… even though Chris started it with the sole intention of improving his English.

The plot couldn’t be simpler, basically: Lucario (from Pokémon) and the character that the author already created in another fanfic, ‘The Aura Bond’, are jumping between different Nintendo worlds trying to stop their disappearance. However, since 2018 it has been surpassed by others like ‘Ambience: A Fleet Symphony’, based on the video game ‘KanColle’, which reached 4,555,264 words and, especially, by ‘The loud house: Revamped’.

This is a fanfic updated daily (daily!) since 2017 and based on the Disney series ‘Una casa de locos’ in which its own author meets the characters and goes on adventures with them. Do you want to read it? It already has 16,777,215 words in an absolute madness divided into 2217 episodes. In its latest episode, it already has characters like Goku, Vegeta, the Winx, the original ‘Dragons and Dungeons’ group, and even Steven Universe. Only for the bravest.

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This cult video game will have an anniversary edition with commentary from its director

The anniversary edition of a cult game that once caused a sensation has been announced, promising many changes and new content.

Whenever an old game is re-edited, it’s good news. Preserving video games is something we shouldn’t take for granted, especially when the industry doesn’t always have its best interests in mind. But it’s particularly exciting when it also brings something new. Not a remake or a remaster, but the classic game with new content that sheds light on the game itself. Like the extras in movies when they come out in physical editions, something we rarely see in video games. Because that’s what Braid Anniversary Edition offers us.

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Originally released in 2008 by Jonathan Blow, Braid is a puzzle platformer that allows us to manipulate time in unusual ways to rescue a princess who has been kidnapped. A deconstruction of classic fantasy stories, in addition to Super Mario itself, it was exceptionally well-received at the time, considered one of the first great indie games in history.

Now the game is set to receive a new version from Thekla. Called Braid Anniversary Edition, this edition of the game aims to offer a version as close to the original as possible while adding substantial enhancements. Among the promised features are improved sound, redrawn graphics, animations with extra frames, and the ability to switch between the old and new versions with the press of a single button. However, what has drawn the most attention is a 15-hour audio track where the game’s director, Jonathan Blow, along with various experts, discusses the game’s design and how it was developed.

Braid Anniversary Edition promises to be the best way to experience Braid today, but we still have to wait a bit to enjoy it. The game will be released on April 30, 2024, for PlayStation 5, PlayStation 4, Xbox Series S, Xbox Series X, PC, iOS, and Android, via Netflix. A golden opportunity to discover or rediscover a video game classic.

What does it mean to be a "Mario ambassador"? At the moment, not even Miyamoto is very clear.

It has always been a priority for you to spread joy, and I am sure you will be a great Mario Ambassador

When Mario was born in ‘Donkey Kong’ as a replacement for Popeye, for whom Shigeru Miyamoto couldn’t get the rights, he didn’t expect that 42 years later he would have to define what a “Mario ambassador” is, so that the former dubbing voice of that character knows exactly what he’s going to do from now on. For now, and from what we’ve seen, it’s all about traveling around the world and telling anecdotes. What else is there to do? Ya-hoo!

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Mamma mia, papa!

In a video that Nintendo showed on Twitter, we see Miyamoto and Charles Martinet hand in hand talking about their friendship. For example, we have learned that the dubber called his creator “Papa” with the mythical voice of the Italian plumber and that he once hit his head when entering a restaurant in Kyoto because he was almost two meters tall. If you play basketball, take a good look at the edges of the doors when traveling to Japan.

Now that we all know that another voice will appear in ‘Super Mario Bros Wonder‘ (probably from an impersonator, we are not yet ready to see Mario with a different accent from so many years) Martinet has been repositioned as “Mario’s Ambassador”. And what does that mean? Well, the same as “visibility payment”: something that nobody knows how to define very well, not even Mario’s creator himself.

“You have traveled all over the world visiting events and doing the voice of Mario for fans, putting smiles on people’s faces. It has always been a priority for you to spread joy, and I am sure you will be a great Mario Ambassador. For all of you watching, you should know that Charles will continue to travel the world and meet fans, do the voices at events, sign autographs and celebrate being with all of you.”

So this new job is basically travel and fun, by the looks of it. Where does one sign up? Although Martinet is 67 years old, we don’t know if that’s the reason why he has stopped playing Mario, or who is going to replace him and how. Pure video game history fading away before our eyes, mamma mia!

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Waluigi Warriors Unite: Fans Rally for the Game the Plumbers Forgot

Mariosyear and Luigi year have passed: it's time for Waluigi to shine.

Nintendo, come, listen to me: we’ve already had a good laugh, but it’s time to fix an injustice that even you know is an injustice. We need to talk about someone you’ve deliberately ignored over the years, but who deserves his first solo game, even if it’s an indie. It’s been Mario’s year and Luigi’s year: it’s time for Waluigi to shine.

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Waaaahh!

The year 2000 not only brought us a new millennium, but also a new character to join the Super Mario franchise and who came to fill a gap in ‘Mario Tennis’. Waluigi was not a sensation right off the bat, and in fact not even Nintendo itself is very clear who he is or where he comes from: in the American instruction manual they announced that he was Wario’s little brother, but not even Charles Martinet, voice of the character, knows if that’s true.

Since then everything has been laughs. He has had two tracks in ‘Mario Kart‘ (Waluigi Stadium on GameCube and the wonderful Waluigi Pinball on Nintendo DS), he was Mario’s enemy in ‘Dance Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix’… and not even for these did he get to be a selectable character in ‘Super Smash Bros Ultimate’ despite the general anger.

And the fact is that Waluigi started as a joke, ended up as an Internet meme and has now taken a 180-degree turn to be loved and respected by fans of the franchise. If Wario has had two chances (in ‘Wario Land’ and ‘Wario Ware’), why not try to give Waluigi his moment of glory? He’s cynical, he’s funny, he’s grotesque, he’s unique, the fans love him… What more do we need for him to replace Toad in the multiplayer of games like ‘Super Mario Bros Wonder’?

Or, why not, a ‘Waluigi Ware’. Or a ‘Ring fit adventure’ style exercise game. Or… The possibilities are endless! Of course, they’re not going to spend a fortune to make a ‘Super Waluigi Odyssey’, but the character deserves more love. Nintendo, get your act together. This is your chance to do justice to Wario’s supposed brother, who will be 25 years old in 2025. It’s his time. Just pray to Miyamoto.

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