The Super Mario game that you surely had never heard of before

What Brian A. Rice came up with was much more disappointing: a game of painting Mario and company in different professions using the mouse. Look no further: this is what there is.

Nowadays, Nintendo does not allow you to do anything with any of their characters if you haven’t licensed them before. And I’m not talking about cameos in TV shows or video games, but even in non-profit children’s plays or YouTube parodies. However, there was a time when they were selling them off, aware that the money they were making compensated for the bad time they would have if the game wasn’t good enough. And this is where the moment when Mario switched to MS-DOS comes in. And, indeed, it wasn’t good.

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

Mamma mia

In the 80s, it was normal for console games to be ported to other platforms sooner or later: ‘Donkey Kong’ and ‘Mario Bros’ were released on Atari, Commodore or Amstrad without any problem: many times they were minor versions of the original arcade, but as long as the money kept coming in, everything was fine.

There were games (versions of ‘Mario Bros’) that didn’t even make it to Nintendo consoles, like ‘Punch Ball Mario Bros’ or ‘Mario Bros Special’. Even the classic ‘Super Mario Bros’ ended up coming out on computers of the time in a “special edition”. And then, in the early 90s, with the Super Nintendo about to be released and Game Boy breaking all expectations, Mario made his first appearance on PC.

We all know -more or less- the misadventures of Nintendo’s mascot in MS-DOS: games like ‘Mario Teaches Typing’, ‘Mario is missing!’, ‘Mario’s Time Machine’ or the preschool games ‘Mario’s early years!’. All of them had an educational purpose: teaching history, numbers or typing. In 1996, ‘Mario FUNdamentals’, a strange compilation of board games like checkers, dominoes, backgammon or Yahtzee, put an end to the disastrous money-grabbing adventure.

Mario doesn’t paint anything

But do you know which was the first of these games for MS-DOS? Probably neither Nintendo nor Merit Software, who distributed the game (and ended up closing in 1996 with the highlight being the ‘Micro Machines’ for Game Boy), remember it. It was ‘Super Mario Bros & Friends: When I Grow Up’, on the cover of which we saw Mario, dressed as a traffic guard, stopping a fire truck driven by Luigi while in the background we could read “Doctor’s Office” and a dog ran away to avoid being run over. But what is this?

If they tell you “Think of a cheap game about Mario” it’s most likely that you think of a somewhat crappy platformer, or maybe even a RPG made without much effort. However, what Brian A. Rice came up with was much more disappointing: a game to paint Mario and company in different professions using the mouse. Look no further: this is what you get.

In total, ‘When I Grow Up’ showed a total of 31 images that displayed different professions, from veterinarian to journalists, passing through astronaut, farmer or professional athlete. All of them had their explanation and connection with the Mario world through a small text (for example, “Mario, the programmer, is having a hard time fighting against Goombas and other annoying bugs. He knew that programmers talked about having “bugs” in their programs from time to time, but this is ridiculous!”). At least they cared about connecting it, hey, something is something.

Mario, at the INEM

It was a professional illustrator who made these 31 images, Rick Incrocci, who according to his website is still active, and the animations that appeared when completing each drawing were made by Glenn Leszczak, who would continue to do game art like ‘World Class Fussball’ for a few more years before disappearing. That’s right: a non-game game created by only two people supervised by their boss, Brian A. Rice. It turned out as it did.

In some illustrations they even allowed themselves the luxury of taking out Link (as a “travel guide” or waiting for “Chef Mario’s” food) or imagining situations where Bowser was judged by Peach. Even in one of the illustrations, the househusband one, it is pointed out that Mario has children. Nowadays Nintendo would have said “Hold your horses”, but it was 1992 and anything goes.

‘Super Mario Bros & Friends: When I Grow Up’ was released in 1991 and an improved version appeared on March 24, 1992 in the United States, where it never left. As a curiosity, it allowed the use of up to 256 colors (most of them repeated, it must be said) and did not allow drawing new lines to the pre-existing drawings. In July 1992, ‘Mario Paint’ appeared, forever making this pseudo-game disappear. One that has been lost in the ether of oblivion even for the biggest fans of Nintendo. Mamma mia!

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

That time when Nintendo licensed Mario to make absolutely terrible computer games

The original ‘Super Mario Bros’ for NES ended up on Atari, Spectrum, Amstrad, and Commodore 64 in frankly worse but unique versions, considering what we’ve seen.

It is Nintendo’s mascot, and it is impossible to imagine it outside of Switch, Nintendo DS or GameCube, but for a while, the Japanese company decided that its character could also be exported to other platforms. Just look at the ‘Super Mario Bros’ from NES that ended up on Atari, Spectrum, Armstrad and Commodore 64 in versions that were frankly worse but unique, as seen. But the big N not only licensed games: in addition, Mario himself starred in exclusive adventures for PC and CD-i. And the results were disastrous.

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

Mario teaches you

It was 1993, and educational games were a business in themselves, even though it’s hard to believe now. That’s why Nintendo America decided that their characters could appear in a few games, just to see what happened. Thus, The Software Toolworks first released ‘Mario is missing!’, a kind of ‘Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?’ in which Miyamoto had no say. In Nintendo Japan, it didn’t sit well because they believed it could be confused with a “real” game of the character.

The idea was that this ‘Mario is missing!’, starring Luigi, would not pose any kind of challenge and was intended, as is, for young children. It was a relative success, and it started a new series of games that, after going through the PC, Nintendo brought to its own consoles: ‘Mario’s time machine’ taught about different periods of history, ‘Mario’s Early Years’ were three games for preschoolers, ‘Mario Teaches Typing’ was designed to learn typing (and was a resounding success)…

‘Mario’s Game Gallery’ was already far from what Nintendo wanted to do with the character, and it was a compilation of classic board games (checkers, dominoes, etc.) with the excuse of having beloved characters there. Nobody liked it too much, and the Japanese company began to distance itself from this type of concessions. It was 1995 and Mario stopped appearing in formats other than Nintendo’s own.

Helped, of course, the reception of the live-action movie ‘Super Mario Bros’: no matter how much money they could make, if the character wasn’t treated correctly, what was the point? Bread for today and hunger for tomorrow. Another game would still come, this time for the failed Phillips CD-i console (which you may know from the Zelda games that became a meme): the infamous ‘Hotel Mario’.

Although apparently Miyamoto and company ended up approving this game, shortly after, and due to the console’s poor success, two others were canceled: ‘Super Mario’s Wacky Worlds’, which was going to be a platformer in the style of the classic saga, and ‘Mario Takes America’, which, luckily, we never got to see. So you know: the next time you control the Italian plumber, think that, as bad as the game may be… it could always have been worse. Mamma mia!

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

Happy news! The VHS that Nintendo made us dream of in December 1992

If you wanted to know what a Nintendo or Sega game was like, you’d better buy Hobby Consolas, and perhaps, with luck, it would come with a promotional VHS.

If you want to know how a game is nowadays, it’s as easy as going on the Internet, searching for a thousand and one reviews, opinions on forums, YouTube videos, and even live streams on Twitch. It’s impossible not to know if a title is made for you. However, thirty years ago it wasn’t that easy and if you wanted to know what a Nintendo or Sega game was like, you better buy the Hobby Consolas magazine and, maybe, with luck, a promotional VHS would come with it. And that’s what happened in Christmas of 1992.

YouTube DOWNLOAD

Happy news!

Normally, promotional videos for upcoming video games were more or less produced, but they were just that: a simple catalog of what was to come. But in 1992, things changed thanks to ‘Happy News!,’ a VHS that came with issue number 15 of Hobby Consolas. To give you an idea, at that time the cover was dominated by ‘World of Illusion’ and ‘Super Mario Land 2,’ and its flagship announcement was the Super Nintendo for 16,990 pesetas (a little over a hundred euros).

The video, sponsored by ERBE, which at that time had the rights to Nintendo in Spain, showed a kind of lost episode of the series ‘Super Mario World’. So much so, that it was clearly made up of different cut and dubbed episodes with the voice of Jordi Estadella playing an Italian Mario who said things in a clearly broken and “made-up” language.

The games that were shown were from both the Game Boy and Super Nintendo catalogs, and among them were ‘Tiny Toons’, ‘Castlevania II’, ‘Megaman II’, ‘Street Fighter II’ or ‘Super Mario Kart’ (with a “Super rearview mirror to see what’s coming at you!”). Finally, Mario and Yoshi managed to defeat the Koopas and recover the games, not before warning that the Club Nintendo, a hotline where you could call and get tips to beat difficult levels, was still active.

Time passed, Hobby Consolas closed, VHS tapes were replaced by DVDs and Blu-Ray, but in these Christmas times, at the end of the year, it is always nice to take refuge in 18 minutes of absurd nostalgia that at that time seemed amazing. Mamma mia!

YouTube DOWNLOAD

Every time you play Super Mario, you are killing thousands of people. And yes, it’s official

It means exactly what you’re thinking: every time you go around jumping and destroying blocks, you’re ending the lives of inhabitants of the Kingdom.

No one read the video game manuals. Let’s face it. It was something nice to browse through, but if the story wasn’t told within the game, it didn’t exist for most people. And yet, the manuals were where the real deal was. For example, in the Sonic manual, it was stated that he wore “powerful sneakers that give him super speed” (implying that it’s not his own doing to run so fast) and in ‘Sonic Heroes’ it was revealed that Doctor Robotnik is actually a feminist. But nothing compares to what the manual of perhaps the most iconic game in history, ‘Super Mario Bros’, reveals to us.

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

Block by block

In the game manual of NES, as it arrived in Spain translated from the United States, it indicated something that changes the way we see the game: according to the story, Bowser, the Koopas, a tribe of turtles famous for their black magic, turned the inhabitants of the Mushroom Kingdom into stones and blocks. That means exactly what you’re thinking: every time you go around jumping and destroying blocks, you’re ending the lives of the Kingdom’s inhabitants.

Or not? Watch out, because this story has an unexpected twist that you may have never heard of. And it’s on page 8 of the same manual, where it states that “if you come across mushrooms that have been turned into blocks or made invisible, they will give you a power”. So, you’re not actually killing them, but freeing them. Calm down.

The translation is very similar to the original Japanese, it’s not that the Americans made up the story. However, when bringing it to the United States, they made it very clear that you, as Mario, are killing the Goombas and the enemies in front of you. No knocking them out or jumping on top of them: you are a cold-blooded killer. That’s apparently how it is.

We all know that manuals have long ceased to exist inside video game boxes, but we still hope that they will become fashionable again in the future. Who knows, maybe we will even find out what the hell was going through the minds of those who invented this crazy story that was later adapted into animation because… Well, let’s be honest, Super Mario Bros is not exactly a narrative masterpiece, right?

Nintendo Switch Online DOWNLOAD

Is Super Mario Wonder a sales failure? Nintendo tells us they have set a record

Super Mario Bros. Wonder has had very good sales in its first days, as Nintendo has announced in the last few hours

Super Mario Bros. Wonder has made a lot of noise in recent months. Since its first trailer, it captivated audiences, and people on social media praised its interesting premise. Upon its release, the reviews have been fabulous, and there seem to be nothing but praises for the game. But how has the reception been from the public? Well, according to Nintendo, not only is Super Mario Bros. Wonder selling well, but it’s doing so very, very quickly.

Super Mario Bros Wonder DOWNLOAD

In fact, Nintendo has announced that Super Mario Bros. Wonder is the fastest-selling Super Mario game in Europe in the history of the franchise. Although we don’t have specific figures and don’t know how it has performed in other regions, this is a significant achievement for Nintendo and indicates that it has worked perfectly.

To learn more about the specific sales figures, we’ll have to wait either for a global update, which could happen sometime this month or the next, or wait for an investor update, which might not occur until 2024. In any case, Nintendo can be quite secretive about its figures on certain occasions, so it’s not expected that they will be very specific about it, at least until they have a clear image they want to share.

In any case, Super Mario Bros. Wonder has a long way to go. It is estimated that across the entire Mario franchise, excluding spin-offs, more than 431 million games have been sold. The best-selling game in the franchise’s history is the original Super Mario Bros., with over 40 million copies sold. Other major successes include New Super Mario Bros., New Super Mario Bros. Wii, and Super Mario Odyssey, with both the first two selling over 30 million copies and the latter selling over 25 million.

Whether Super Mario Bros. Wonder will join the ranks of Mario’s bestsellers remains to be seen in the coming years. However, it’s clear that it has started on a strong note, and Nintendo must be more than pleased with that.

Super Mario Bros Wonder DOWNLOAD